Gaffer on "Gardening Leave" for Elders return

[onechanceonegoal]

An official spokesperson for Osmotherley today denied that there were security issues surrounding the forthcoming clash versus Elders second string in two weeks time. "No, it is not that the Council have refused to pay the extra police costs to ensure the safety of all playing, supporting and mainly managing the sides for this game, that our manager, Paul 'the firecracker' Fairman is not attending." The spokesperson continued " this period of gardening leave was booked well in advance and the fact that it happens to coincide with a game against Elders second team is pure coincidence" He continued "at no time did the manager use any bad language although we are sorry if anyone misheard when he was shouting to our defence to mark the Cat Funt upfront. Paul realises his mistake Cat Funtio, the little known Bolivian striker is no longer at Elders after an unsuccessful loan spell in September" When asked about the long term future of the manger at the club the board released a short statement giving Paul their full backing and support.

[safehands]

Reports coming in that Fawcett has been found after going missing on Sunday morning. Family and friends are said to be devastated. More to follow.....

[richb]

[tomharrison]

advice to anyone who wishes to get on the wrong side of "Furmo" when he has his trackies tucked in his socks, i heard the bolivian strikers loan spell was cut short after he refused to play in a league where childish hand gestures can cost you your life!

[merle]

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